Cycles

Malachi

I grew up, nicotine clouds and breathing in that second hand My cousins let me take swigs from unfamiliar cans Giving me advice like I don’t gotta keep my dick in my pants That’s just some shit you gotta do to be a man Maybe this is why I’m stuck in my ways Stranger to change Learning how to fly is limited to the height of my cage Am I a busted pipe or a diamond, let’s check the pressure gauge It’s hard to tell my story when I only got a title page My woman couldn’t read me Decided she didn’t need me I tried but she ain’t believe me I really thought she would free me I’m bonded, what would you call it I choose death over dishonor I’m black, I’m big, I’m a monster I’m faking, I’m an imposter I’m diving deep in my bottle And disappointing my father I pray I don’t have a daughter This not what I want her watching Yo daddy messed up as fuck And he pray you never grow up And see he done drowned in his cup And when you call he don’t wake up And when you scream he don’t wake up And when you cry he don’t wake up And when you pray he don’t wake up I just hope I loved you enough Man I got issues Damn I’m tearing up where’s the tissue You left me a while ago and to this day I still miss you I could try until I die but it’s no way I could forget you But I’m a man we not allowed to feel what we done been through I was taught to be the one my folks can depend on Everybody looking at me like we’re at a prom send off One apple on the tree get cut we all get our blend on You pulled with your crew and seen us, and now your men gone They told me that I had to fight to know the way They told me that I better not ever cry or I was gay When you learn that type of shit it don’t just up and walk away You mad that I can’t open up but that’s how I was raised x3 I’m tryna brake the cycles x4 Freedom is just an illusion that’s my conclusion if you feel different then prove it Just try me that sounds amusing but Imma dissect diffusions real precisely The cyclical patterns are just recycling They’re probably finna be the reason that I get indicted Will you write me Or will you find a better man walking down a better path scheming on a better plan I was making crumbs, he got bread and bacon sizzling in the pan I got out and heard the news now she’s a bitch, a slut, a tramp And I cannot forgive her, not never ever Even after all the times I cheated on her it was several She always took me back, she was my peace, she made me better She always tried to fix me but I’m stubborn I ain’t let her Rather listen to my cousin nem Learn from my uncle nem Mimic my brother nem We all condemned Born into malicious patterns it feels like it never ends I’m searching for something strong enough to relinquish toxic trends Maybe I could try to use the tenacity of my sins they threw me in and said it’s up to me whether I sink or swim I’m living fast but karmas in the race and she gone always win I’m trying to break the cycles for my son so where do I begin Ya diggg

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Cycles

Malachi

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